I Got A Hug Today!

Now, you’re probably saying to yourself, “Big deal! Who didn’t get a hug today?” And you’re right. In fact, I got several hugs today myself, but one was special. That one was a real hug.

“Gimme a hug. You ARE important to me.” I won’t go into all the details surrounding it, but it meant a lot to me, and the person that gave it to me means a lot to me and I really appreciated it. I cried after I walked out the door.

Why all the fuss? Well, I actually don’t like hugging. Well, truthfully, it’s not that I don’t like hugging; I just don’t like to throw them around a lot. I feel that hugs are super intimate, and that they should be reserved for certain occasion. I think that hugs are just tossed here and there so much that they are beginning to lack in the “Emotions Department”. Maybe it’s just me.

In high school, I was a little more vocal about it, and flat out refused hugs. If someone was coming at me – arms outstretched – I would just hold my hand out in proper ‘Supremes’ fashion and say, “Ah ah ah ah ah… I don’t hug.” Maybe I have a fear of intimacy. Maybe I have emotional difficulties. Or maybe I’m right.

I do enjoy a good hug, just not everyday, twelve times a day.

During my time in Yellowknife, I never hugged my clients, except when I was moving and saying goodbye. Then it felt right- but even then, it was only a few clients that I hugged. Here in Toronto, hugs are almost a law. Every client needs one before they walk down the stairs. I sometimes wonder what would happen if I didn’t; if I ran like Forrest Gump to the other side of the salon and hid by the dryers. What if they fell down the stairs and I had only me to blame.

And then on the social scene; you have a hug when you run into someone. A hug when someone comes over. A hug when they leave. A hug when you’re just running to the bar to get another martini. “I’m going for a pee. Gimme a hug!” The list goes on.

You never see me hug Cell Phone Boy, and he’s my best friend. We’ll hug everyone else at the end of the party, but we give each other a wave and a “Goodnight. Call me tomorrow.” We just never have. I can probably count on my fingers the amount of hugs we’ve given each other.

And then there’s John Boy. John Boy is a new addition to our circle of friends; ever since he started dating The Great Scot in November. He’s a great guy and a lot of fun. I really, truly like him… but I’ve never hugged him. Much like Cell Phone Boy, he gets a wave and a “Goodnight. Thanks for coming over / having us over.” I feel bad that I’ve never told him that I am a ‘non-hugger’ at heart. At this point, it would feel odd to start… and that can be added to the fact that a hug is odd for me to begin with. I hope he understands and doesn’t just think I’m a dickhead. Maybe he’s a non-hugger too.

Now, I feel caution setting in as I think about all my friends that read my blog… friends I hug. Please don’t be offended. It’s not you, it’s me. Hugs are expected and given around and it’s really a beautiful thing. They by no means make me uncomfortable (unless they were nude hugs… we all know how I feel about nudity), I am just happy to be with or without them.

I assume that not everyone feels the same way, and most people actually receive some sort of emotional boost after each and every hug. Not me. I like the reserved ones. I like the ones that are perfect for the moment.

I liked when I hugged my friend who just lost her father.

I liked when I hugged The Boyfriend after we got back together.

I liked when I hugged Webbie (a great client, and an even greater friend) after we both cried during a haircut.

I liked when I hugged The Bride just before she walked down the aisle.

I liked when I got my hug tonight.

These are hugs I will remember for the rest of my life.

Thanks for tonight. It meant a lot to me.
I love you.