Tan Line Rant!
Those who know me know at least one thing. I (heart) Underpants. I love 'em! Don't know what it is, but I just think that cute underpants are a must for any occasion. For the most part, it's only you who knows what you've got on, but hey . . . aren't you worth it, to have the best and cutest darn underpants covering your bits?
I was on the verge of writing a smart, clever and oh so funny little post all about the wonders that are underpants; the origin; the material; the style. Everything one must know about the most intimate of intimate apparel. Pre-writing, I was searching for a fantastic photo to go along with the post and then I came across this. . . .(See photo).
Now, don't get me wrong. I think tan lines are H-O-T! In fact (and this might be filed under the 'Too Much Information' category) but I'll even wear my underpants in the tanning bed for 3/4 of the time, so that I get a nice, crisp little line, but still maintain some colour on my buttocks (tan lines are Hot, but white-ass Wally is Not!).
However, I think one ought to 'tan line' with caution. If one is going to possess said tan line, then one ought to wear underpants that cover it until such time presents itself to present the line. Alternatively, one might decide to go without underpants at all; not my personal choice but I hear it's gaining popularity in many Canadian cities such as Moosejaw and The Greater Metropolitan area of Flin Flon.
Whatever your choice, one must never EVER have a tan line and then wear underpants that do not even come close to covering. I mean honestly! Look at this fool. WHY? Why would somebody do this? Who thinks this is hot? Really, it makes no sense. He would not make it across the threshold to my boudoir with that unsightly line . . . not to mention the really bad animal print (um, I think that went out before I even left High School).
So please remember. Friends do not let friends tan line drunk!
I’m sorry, I’d love to have dwelled more on my original idea, but it’ll have to wait for another day. I have to go bleach out my eyeballs.
I was on the verge of writing a smart, clever and oh so funny little post all about the wonders that are underpants; the origin; the material; the style. Everything one must know about the most intimate of intimate apparel. Pre-writing, I was searching for a fantastic photo to go along with the post and then I came across this. . . .(See photo).
Now, don't get me wrong. I think tan lines are H-O-T! In fact (and this might be filed under the 'Too Much Information' category) but I'll even wear my underpants in the tanning bed for 3/4 of the time, so that I get a nice, crisp little line, but still maintain some colour on my buttocks (tan lines are Hot, but white-ass Wally is Not!).
However, I think one ought to 'tan line' with caution. If one is going to possess said tan line, then one ought to wear underpants that cover it until such time presents itself to present the line. Alternatively, one might decide to go without underpants at all; not my personal choice but I hear it's gaining popularity in many Canadian cities such as Moosejaw and The Greater Metropolitan area of Flin Flon.
Whatever your choice, one must never EVER have a tan line and then wear underpants that do not even come close to covering. I mean honestly! Look at this fool. WHY? Why would somebody do this? Who thinks this is hot? Really, it makes no sense. He would not make it across the threshold to my boudoir with that unsightly line . . . not to mention the really bad animal print (um, I think that went out before I even left High School).
So please remember. Friends do not let friends tan line drunk!
I’m sorry, I’d love to have dwelled more on my original idea, but it’ll have to wait for another day. I have to go bleach out my eyeballs.
posted by Lance Morrison @ 2:04 AM
3 Comments:
that is not a pretty picture. No sir. Not by a long shot. your pants from under are much nicer.
Why Mr. Mitchell. You're going to give a girl a bad reputation, what with letting everyone know that you know what my underpants look like and all. I dare say.
But thanks for the comment on my UP's. there will be better pictures to follow in the series of underpants posts.
Okay. When your underpants cost $43+ GST, and they say 'Hand wash. Lay Flat to Dry', you do just that. And my barstools are just the perfect spot to lay underpants flat.
Also, having you and Cell Phone Boy over for dinner was a last minute thing, so one ought expect the house being in a slight state of dis-array, with underpants askew.
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