Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Games Night!


Saturday night saw a group of friends sitting around an apartment for a riveting games night. There was The Boyfriend, Cell Phone Boy, Cousin Julie, The Great Scot, The Halfaneese, The Lesbians, and the Philanthropist and myself. We missed Cousin Janet, as she was home ‘with consumption’.

Things started well with Win, Lose or Draw. This is when we learn that The Boyfriend and Cousin Julie are FAR too competitive at games. Honestly guys, they’re just games. There’s no need for hurt feelings and name calling. And I still attest that ‘Go Whole Hog’ is an easy phrase to draw, if you guys would only have said ‘Hog’ as opposed to pig, swine, bacon, ham, piggy, police, etc. The Girls won this game, literally at the last second in the second tie breaker.

Moving on to a quick game of Hoopla! As we were all playing as a team, this game had much more laughter, and a lot less mean hatefulness. Puma’s ‘Flamingo’ was a huge hit; in my mind, her proudest moment of the evening.

Then to the feature game for the evening: Rummoli. For those of you that don’t know about this game… well, you’ll have to look it up; it’s far too detailed to write out. Just know it’s a card game, you can win money, and it's F-U-N: FUN!! I think I took in one of the biggest (if not the biggest) pot of the evening. My total winnings: $39.35. Not bad for a nights work. Mind you, it might have been a bit more if Cousin Julie hadn’t dipped her sticky little fingers into my pot. Downside: Travelling back into the city with $39.35 in nickels and dimes.

There was some talk of alcohol being consumed, but I’m sure that never happened. No, not this group. A little fizzy water and a spot of tea was all we needed. It is rather odd that we woke up to several empty wine bottles (and by several, I do mean about a dozen... well, a bakers dozen), an empty bottle of Cinzanno, and a large dent in two bottles of Vodka. But again, I’m sure it wasn’t us.

Ahhh, this is the life. Live in downtown of Canada’s largest city, and weekends in the suburbs with friends around a games table.

Good times in Etobicoke.

Usual Suspect


Would it be unusual
To leave it all behind
And search for peace of mind?

I wouldn’t be the usual
I never quite fit in
On the outside looking in

But I am not the usual
The usual has fooled you all
And I’m the biggest fool of all
I’m in love with you
I’m in love with you

And would it be unthinkable
To leave my present place
And take a leap of faith?
And would this thought be radical?
I hope I’m not to bold
Don’t leave this tale untold.

Cause I am not the usual
The usual has fooled you all
And I’m the biggest fool of all
I’m in love with you
I’m in love with you

I’ll bring you roses
And cut off all the thorns
I’ll Hire a mariachi band
Y’know I’ll even play the horns
I will try my hand at poetry
And though my rhyming may be poor
I guarantee your life with me would never be a bore

Cause I am not the usual
I have found a different sound
I know my way around
And my love for you is so very beautiful
Like Marilyn Monroe
A real life picture show

But I am not the usual
The usual has fooled you all
And I’m the biggest fool of all
I’m in love with you
I’m in love with you!
-Z. Theodorou/V. Cardinal/D. Martin/G. Sorochan/R. Hunter

Monday, February 27, 2006

Silly Joke

A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience.

Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up?"

God replied, "No. You have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a facelift, liposuction and tummy tuck. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well look her best.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was hit and killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me out of the path of the ambulance?"

God replied, "Girrrlllllll, I didn't even recognize you."

-via email from Cell Phone Boy

Controversial Topic: Same Sex Marriages

As I sit, bored, clicking from random blog to random blog, link to link, I came across a really interesting blogger. Rodney has a great bunch of posts. I suggest you read This post in particular. Fun fun funny.

Anyway, I was looking around his blog and found an attention-grabbing link titled “Steps to recovery of Bible Abuse”. ‘Odd title,’ I thought, and of course, curiosity got the better of me and I clicked.

There is in interesting Article on Same Sex Marriage, and how the bible says NOTHING against them. This site is ‘A Response to the Abusive Use of the Bible Against Gays and Lesbians and All Others Oppressed and Alienated by Religion.”

I think I may have to forward this link to our Prime Minister, Steven Harper. Heck, I might as well send it off to the whole Conservative Party... And maybe the Republicans of the United States of America… And maybe Rev. Fred Phelps... And Jerry Fallwell…

I have no problem with people who are against Same Sex Marriage, but tell us so because you don't believe in it. Don't hide behind a 2000 year old book, quoting passages you've never even read, or have mis-interpreted. And unless you've actually sat down and talked to God, over a spot of tea and a coffee cake, and (s)he's told you that (s)he's against Homosexuality, then you can't exactly speak on God's behalf, can you? So until then, you can put down that protest sign.

My! Saving the world is such busy work!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Three Songs?


I often ask people, "If there was a movie made of your life, what are three songs that would be on the original soundtrack?" It doesn’t have to be your top three favourite songs of all time, just three that would be there. Three songs that mean something to you, or did mean something to you at an important point in your life. A very interesting and difficult question, I think.
Here are my answers, in no particular order:



What A Wonderful World, (George Weiss / Bob Thiele):
Needs no explanation, does it? We have the choice each day as to how we look at the world. We can look and see all the shit and misery and think to ourselves, "What a crap-hole! I'm gonna spend the rest of my day being pissed off that there are holes in our ozone, and that person just dared ask me for change and that person cut me off and my boss is a jerk...!"
Or we can see the trees of green, and the red roses too. We can notice people shaking hands saying "How do you do?" (Even though we know that they're really saying, "I love you"). We can even see the beauty in the face of a crying baby and say to ourselves, "What a Wonderful World! Oh Yeah." Which one will have the most positive effect on the world and to ourselves?

Nothing Fails,
(M. Ciccone / G. Sigsworth / J. Griffiths):
I think that at a point in every ones life, they question spirituality. Admit it, we do. It's human nature. ‘What do I believe?’ ‘I've been told to believe this, do I?’ ‘Is there a God?’ ‘In what form?’ ‘Why are we here?’ ‘Why am I Here?’ ‘What's the meaning of life?’ While this song doesn't answer these question for us, it did offer me a calm.
I was going through a very intense spiritual awakening a few years ago, and was lost. I have never believed in a religion or God, per se, but here I was questioning something. At the same time, I was planning to uproot my entire life and move across the country. Leave all my financial security, my friends, my family, everything I've ever known. What the fuck? But then this song... this song helped it all make sense. It's true that you could take it all away, but I would still have it all. Because now that I have a firm grasp on what I believe inside my heart, my head and my spirit, I'm not longer scared of falling. I know that it will be okay. As long as I stay true to my beliefs, I’ll be fine. Nothing else matters.
This is a love song, but it's not sung to a person. But, rather, it’s sung to the spiritual realm.

3: Usual Suspect, (Z. Theodorou/V. Cardinal/D. Martin/G. Sorochan/R. Hunter):
I wish that everyone feels love like this once in their life. This song tells the story of 'Person a' who is in love with 'Person b'. 'Person b' is so outstanding that everyone is in love with them, but 'Person a' is trying to let them know that they are different. "I am not like all the others, 'cause those people have just fooled you into thinking they were in love with you. I am truly in love with you; so much so, that I will go to any lengths to show it to you." 'Person a' realizes how much (s)he must sound like everyone else, but just listen to the emotion in their voice... their love is true. No matter how 'radical' they may sound, they have to take the leap and tell 'Person b' how they really feel.
This is the greatest love song I've ever heard, and I have been fortunate enough to hear it live, several times over. Whenever you tell someone you love them, be it the first time or the millionth time, it should have this much emotion behind it. Otherwise, it's just a word.

Well, that’s my selection. What are yours?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Zozo


I met Zozo at a gig she was playing in Calgary. I didn't want to go out that night, but my then boyfriend had promised the band he would be there. I had just flown in from the Yellowknife; I just found out a client had died; I had been awake since 7am; my flight was delayed. All I wanted was a glass of wine and a cigarette. But Kyle was better at convincing me to go out than I was at convincing him to stay in. And I'm so glad he was, because I would have missed the chance to meet one of the most fabulous persons in my life.

From the minute I walked into the bar, my energy lifted. SoulBody was playing Jill Scott's 'A Long Walk', and Zozo was taking command of the vocals with more energy and force that I have ever witnessed live. On their first break, we discovered that she was actually going to be going to Yellowknife 2 weeks later.

That trip was the first of several visits to Canada's north for Zozo. And with each trip we were given the chance to grow as friends over coffee; brunch at a greasy spoon; dinner; wine; gettin' her hair did; and flopped around my condo, just chatting. We talked about music, travel, God / spirituality, ex's, goals, life... everything. This diva can talk! And she has a laugh that will lift any mood.

As I mentioned, her talent goes far beyond just vocals. She is a performer in every sense of the word. I've been to so many of her gigs, and they are always packed to the rafters. Even people who don't dance can't help themselves to move to her rhythm. As I type this, I'm listening to her CD and bopping in my seat. Something in her voice just makes you want to move. On-stage she will make you laugh, scream and cheer. A fabulous black woman with all the confidence and attitude one can possibly possess.

Her newest album, 'Essence of Life', is being released this spring. You can sample several tracks on her website (Note: They are not yet mixed or mastered), including 'Usual Suspect', my personal favourite love song... ever.

Me loves you, Zozo. Hope to see you soon.

Monday, February 20, 2006

Smoking Update!

Just in case anyone was wondering, I thought I'd update the status of My Quit!

I'll admit, since quitting on January 1st I have fed the Nico-Demon(pictured) three times. Well, two and a half, but let's round up. Besides that here are my stats, to the minute:

Time Smoke-Free: 50 days, 13 hours, 11 minutes and 47 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 1264
Lifetime Saved: 9 days, 15 hours
Money Saved: $400.00

Thanks to QuitNet for keeping track of the stats for me. Any smokers who are trying to quit, click the link. It's a great resource.

I Am Not A Prude!

I swear I’m not. I do have an aversion to nudity, but it’s not because I’m reserved. I love being naked as much (if not more) than the next guy. It’s just that I feel than nudity has its place, and when it’s unnecessary, I am uncomfortable.

My friends harass me about it constantly. There are always the little hits here and there about it, but I really feel as no one really understands my objection. I am totally comfortable being nude in front of others… as long as it’s appropriate. But where are the lines drawn between appropriate and inappropriate?

At the Gym: I have no problem showering at the gym. I will walk from the shower to the lockers snugly wrapped in my little towel. Once at my destination I will unwrap, towel off, and get dressed. Everything is visible, and quite appropriate. I will not, however, walk around the locker room with everything flopping about; going from here to there for fifteen minutes with the boys on display. Why? Not appropriate! Also, I would not fuss about trying to put on my underpants while still wearing a towel… you people just look silly.

In Movies:
I personally feel that nudity and the human form are overly abused in film. I question the motives of the producers of many films. Is there a point to all this titty we are subject too? And it’s not just boobies that I speak of… there is often (albeit, less often) useless shots of boys bits on the big screen. Yes, I agree, some scenes really do benefit from it, but it is so rare; I’d say 3.7% of the time that nudity is used, it is appropriate.

Halle Berry flashing her boobies in ‘Swordfish’ had no point. However, it seemed to fit perfectly fine when she bared them in ‘Monster’s Ball’. In “Brokeback Mountain”, there were several nude shots, and not one of them seemed out of place. Again, this is not just me being gay and only liking penis shots… the nude female scenes also worked in this movie. When Ennis and his wife were attempting copulation and started to argue, there were bums and bare breasteses all over the place, but that was reasonable; in reality, that is exactly what it would look like. But I think the rumours of Collin Ferrell’s legendary schlong scenes in ‘Home at the end of the world’ were just used as a publicity stunt, and that’s just stupid. Do you have such little faith in the quality of your movie that you need to show someone’s willy to get people to go see it?

But then, even in movies where there are sex scenes, and nudity would be used, often there is no need for the scene. I’m sorry; I do not think the Angelina Jolie / Ethan Hawk sex scene was at all integral to the plot of ‘Taking Lives’. The movie was perfectly fine without it… but I guess the target audience for the film (mindless straight men) appreciated – not to mention expected- the sight of her more than perfect rack. Then there’s pornography; all the sex scenes and nudity is completely necessary… and appreciated. That’s what porn is, and what is expected.

Walking around naked is completely fine with me as well. Like I said earlier, I love being nude. I often walk around my house or The Boyfriends house, with little or no clothes. And why not? But if I had friends over, I would never! I’ll change in from of them in the gym, but if I’m at home, I slip behind the door.

Basically, there is little need for nudity, and I think it should be reserved for those times. If it is not advantageous, why bother? If you’re just comfortable with your nudity, that’s fine, but be comfortable somewhere where it will not make others uncomfortable; like a nude beach. If you’re showing it/them off, then you’re an arrogant twit… and it’s usually not all that impressive anyway, we’ve all seen better. If you’re doing it for the money, then you’re a whore (sorry Angelina… really I do respect you for everything else you do).

Then again, maybe I am just a prude.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

More Of My Work. . .


Jamie and April. These two talented women were my Right Hand Persons for all the photo shoots I did in Yellowknife.

Jamie, a Fashion Designer / Stylist either made or arranged all the clothing and jewellery for a series of 13 photo shoots we worked on together. As she grows in popularity, I was honoured to work with her one last time on her first Jewellery Fashion Show.

April, Make-up Artiste Extraordinaire! What this woman can create with a brush and some powder astounds me. From her eccentric mind to the skin in seconds. A true artist in her field, she possesses energy and talent that can only add up to success.

It was a pleasure working with these two, and a treat to use them as models in this shot. Shot in the hallway of my Yellowknife Condo, this is truly one of my favourite photographs I've produced to date.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

The Who?

Help! I need somebody.

To help me figure this out. Apparently there are 72 musical artists represented in this image. So far, I've found 24, but that leaves 48 undiscovered. The undiscovered artists are INXS of the found ones, and I can't have that. I'm also not that into Pop Culture, so I may not know some bands (ie: I had to 'google' Spoon to see if they were a band, and I'm sure the eels might be something, but I don't know).

Click on the image to make it larger. Post a comment to name any found MA's, and their coordinates please. I'll never sleep until I get them all. Okay, well maybe I'll sleep. Actually, maybe I'll forget about this in a few hours. Who knows?


So far I've found:


Madonna (in the shop window w/child), Queen (In the lower center), Guns & Roses (Lower Left), Matchbox 20 (Lower Right), Rolling Stones (Dead Center), U2 (Center Right, written on the wall), Led Zepplin (In the sky), Gorillaz (fairly obvious), White Snake (Just above the Queen), Black Crows (Center Right, on the street sign), Sex Pistols (The Queen is holding them, the dirty girl), Crowded House (The loft at Center Right), The Eagles (Fairly obvious), Seal (Right beside Madonna), Beach Boys (Right Center), The Cars (Under the Rolling Stones), Blur (Man in pink, Lower Right), Twisted Sister (Center), Hole (In the intersection), Cowboy Junkies (At the intersection),The Police (By the cars), Spoon (Above Blur), Blind Melon (Lower Right, On the produce cart beside the...), Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Looking Back

Last night, after much Valentines Day snuggling, The Boyfriend and I decided to look through his old photo albums. Perchance to laugh; perchance to smile. It was so much fun. It's always fun to look at pictures of friends from 5, 10, 20 years ago; especially if you never knew what they looked like back then. I also got a glimpse of some other friends from yesteryear that had made it into his photo album. Cousin Janet, you were so adorable at 7!

This prompted me to take a trip down my own memory lane. Funny. It's not as much fun looking at yourself at ten years old, as it is looking at The Boyfriend at the same age.

Things started well with this adorable photo. Obviously nervous, I clutch my tiny three year old hands and tighten my lips. My cute light brown wavy hair, gently highlighted by the flash, sits perfectly in an early 80's boy-bob. Cheeks just ready for pinching as I try to push my tongue through my lower lip. If I can maintain this cuteness, I'll be set!





As I got older, apparently I became bulimic and my cowlick really started to come into it's own. My once light hair has turned as dark as my aboriginal eyes. At some point in between these photo's I banged my eyebrow, as is apparent from the faint scar right above the glisten in my right eye. I am coming into my birthright as you can see; the first signs of the infamous Morrison nose (which I love, so make no comments on it), but those teeth! Teeth only a mother can love.
Still not completely grown into my teeth... or my cowlick, my Grade 6 photo is notable mainly because this is the year I got a choice in my clothing purchases. This is also the year that people started making reference to the Fred Savage resemblance.

One day, yes one day, I will be pretty.

A Brief History of My Career, Pt.2: The decision.

-Continued from January 2006
From then on, I had it in my heart that I was going to be a hairstylist. Occasionally, friends and I would get together and we'd play 'Salon'. As I had no idea what I was doing, we most often just did big silly hair, as it was easiest . . . and fun to see each other with big mid-80's hair in the mid-90's (as is apparent from the photo here). But, I was still honing my craft, building my confidence for the day I took the fashion industry by storm. But then I heard some terrible news . . . a stylist makes no money. Well, Heavens to Bette Middler! I wouldn’t want to embark on a career path that was going to send me into the poorhouse. Instead I decided that I would just work at odd jobs and have no ambition.

One particular morning my mother woke up to me still awake from the night before (back when I watched TV, I could find myself at 9am having not gone to sleep, flipping from infomercial to infomercial). “I’m sick of you just sitting around doing nothing. You’re gonna at least help me around here. Get ready, we’re going shopping.” So off we went to a parade of Wal-marts', Saans', Extra Foods’, and the local Tim Hortons. Not wanting to listen to 'Dance Mix '92 (the only tape my mother kept in her car) for the fourth time that day, I switched to the radio, just in time to hear the Employment Report. “Really Big Video Store is looking for a full time clerk. Wage starting at $10/hr. Shift work. Apply in person, with resume, to Donna. No phone calls please.”

Well that’s sounds like fun. I’ve always loved movies, and my family bonded over home rentals on a very regular basis. I liked people. I loved customer service. Working at a video store was perfect. And ten bucks an hour to start is pretty good (especially when you’re living at home not paying rent). So I applied. Got hired. Started that Monday.

I made fast friends with all the staff. Well, except Terri, but no one liked her and she liked no one. In particular, I met Steve and Jen; an east coast couple that had just moved to Yellowknife to start their hairstyling career. I told them about how I had always wanted to be a stylist, but wanted a job that made more money.

“Well, there is pretty good money in hair, if you’re good and you’re ambitious.” they told me. I had no idea about educators, salon ownership, commissions etc. Mother had told me there was no money because when she was a stylist in the late 60’s and early 70’s, there was no money in it. But after the glam rock / disco era, hair was huge (figuratively and literally). Suddenly, hairstylists were GODS!

Well, being the textbook Scorpio I am, I immediately started researching my destined career path. The path I was meant to be on since I learned that first braid 12 years earlier. I researched schools: how they taught, location, reputation. Marvel College was the winning school.

Within months, I was out of the video store, packing my worldly possessions, saying goodbye to friends and loved ones and moving to Edmonton.

If you read back to one of my first posts (when I talked about fears), I talked about thinking back to those small decisions in life. And their ripple effect on our lives. As I sat packing, I thought about these small decisions. Had I gone to bed earlier that night, mom would not have asked me to go shopping with her. Not going shopping I would not have heard of the job at Really Big Video Store. Having not worked at RBVS, I would not have known that hairstylists could make money. Not knowing that, I would possibly still be in Yellowknife, still in the closet, still working as a taxi dispatcher, still making $8/hour, still living at home. But that wasn’t for me I though… No!

I was going to be a college girl!

-To Be Continued…

Monday, February 13, 2006

Huh?

I got this email today . . . one of those constantly circulating forwards that we've all had a few times. But I do like this one, in particular. I found it very interesting, and thought I'd post it here, rather than forward it on to everyone. Enjoy!
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
I cdnuol't blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmaun mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
If you can raed tihs psas it on !!

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Name Game: Lance Morrison Edition

Randomly playing around online this afternoon, I decided to see what pictures of me (if any) would appear if I Googled my name. Nothing with me, but apparently there are more Lance Morrison’s than I had imagined. Then I wondered if there was something in a name. Like astrology or numerology or something, could I have similarities with other Lance Morrison’s out there? Let's examine further:


Case Study 1: Lance Morrison, Recording Artist: With a solo CD, this Lance Morrison is a renowned bass player. I do have artistic talent, but no musical talent. And I am just guessing, but I think this Lance Morrison is a lot more comfortable with nudity than I am. Nope, we're completely different.
More on him at www.lancemorrison.com


Case Study 2: Lance Morrison, District Leader for Carolina's Seventh-Day Adventists Ministry: WOW! How much is he not like me? Well, I am spiritual, but I could never be a District Leader. Our fashions are complete opposites, but we obviously both have enough respect for ourselves to only wear a properly tied tie! And we both look good in blue. Alas, I still think we are not cut from the same Lance Morrison Cloth. Too bad, he looks like a nice guy.

Case Study 3: Lance Morrison, Newark Police Chief: Well, I'm not a cop, but I am law abiding. I'm not overweight, bald, moustached, grey haired, or cursed with small ears, so appearance is out. I do have an all black dress code at work, but I hardly think that’s enough to base a thesis on.

Case Study 4: Lance Morrison, The Principal of Morrison Accountancy: Interesting fact about this Lance Morrison; we share the same full name. Even our middle names are exact! We must be twins . . . oh wait . . . an accountant huh. Anyone who knows me knows I am no good with money. However we are both entrepreneurs (or at least have been). We both wear glasses. And I do have a pin striped blazer! And he lives in New Zealand, and I once saw NZ on a map. Okay, I'm grasping at straws here. I got nothing.


Case Study 5: Lance Morrison, Hairstylist: This is it! This guys a hairstylist. And a Canadian, more specifically he's a Torontonian. And a spiritualist. And he eats organic. And he's gay. And I even own the same shirt he's wearing. And Sunglasses. And there's no denying that there is a definite resemblance. Eerie! In fact. . . oh wait a minute. . . oh yeah. Yep, that’s me. Never mind.



So I guess there’s nothing in a name, except a name. It's too bad; I was all excited that I had stumbled upon some great code or something. Some undiscovered link to our personalities and mannerisms that had never been explored before. I was gonna patent my idea and be rich.

But, I guess I'll just go back to work. Bother!

More of my work...


Here's some more pictures from my portfolio.
Deepak is another friend and good client of mine. I'm still amazed at how many straight (Yes ladies, he's a hetero) men will allow a gay man to shave their chest for them. All one has to do is ask.
These photo's were taken just two blocks from my house in one of the quietest parks in the city.
Much thanks to photographer Lisa G. and Makeup artist Kayleen M. for a great days work.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Mama

Mama, Thank you for who I am
Thank you for all the things I'm not
Forgive me for the words unsaid
And for the times I forgot

Mama, remember all my life
You showed me love, you sacrificed
Think of those young and early days
How I've changed
Along the way
Along the way

And I know you believed
And I know you had dreams
And I'm sorry it took all this time to see
That I am where I am because of your truth
And I miss you,
I miss you

Mama forgive the times you cried
Forgive me for not making right
All of the storms I may have caused
And I've been wrong
Dry your eyes
Dry your eyes

Cause I know you believed
And I know you had dreams
And I'm sorry it took all this time to see
That I am where I am because of your truth
And I miss you,
I miss you

Mama I hope this makes you smile
I hope you're happy with my life
At peace with every choice I made
How I've changed
Along the way
Along the way

Cause I know you believed in all of my dreams
And I owe it all to you, Mama.
-Il Divo
I love you Mom. I can't wait to see you in June.

A Night Of . . . Culture?


HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

The Philanthropist and I spent a wonderful night at the Air Canada Center with about 15 thousand middle-aged women, 300 fags and two straight men. Yes ladies and gentlemen, good times were had by all at Toronto's Il Divo concert.

Stop laughing.

I only found out I was going to the concert 9 hours before I was off to the show itself. The Lesbians tentatively offered me the tickets Sunday night, and confirmed this morning, so off we went. The P had just been to the symphony this past weekend, so I thought he'd be the perfect date to accompany me . . . well, that and The Boyfriend was working late . . . and Cell Phone Boy had no idea who they were . . . and The Halfaneese was signing his lease, and was being driven by the Great Scot . . . and . . . well, The P was just fine, no complaints.

The lighting was terrible. Apparently, the Lighting Director decided that blinding the entire audience was the best way to highlight said Divo's voices. You know, lose one sense and heighten the others. The obscure light show was going directly into our eyes the entire show. And Helen Keller could do a better job at operating a spotlight than the eight operators they had on staff.

The 'acting' in between signs was so bad that they made Adam Sandler look like an Academy Award winner several times over. "Sebastian, do you remember that time in Rome when we were reciting poetry and we met those beautiful women?" Uh huh. Honestly, I've seen better acting when I watched Madonna in 'Swept Away'.

As far as the music goes . . . I have to admit, I kinda liked it. They have great voices, even if they are a boy band. I guess I like 'Popera'. Comes as no surprise, I guess. I enjoy Sarah Brightman, so why wouldn't I like a French/Spanish/American/Swiss group singing in Italian?

The best part of the evening is watching the sea of soccer moms and cougars coo and drool for 2 hours. When they dedicated their song 'Mama' to all of the mothers in the audience, I swear every woman in the room had a multiple orgasm. It suddenly got really humid and I think the 85 year old grandmother beside me fainted. P noted that he had never before seen a mosh pit made up entirerly of grey haired women.

All in all, a good night. Many thanks to The Lesbians for the free tickets. And you know what, it's true; you would have hated it.

Monday, February 06, 2006

It’s a Wonderful Day in the Neighbourhood!


I'm not sure if it's public knowledge or not, so I won't share a name, but a good friend of mine just got good news. He found an apartment . . . and the best part is that it's just down the street from me.

Nice that in a city of 4,558,800 people, my friend lands a place 86 addresses east of me; that’s only 43 houses away.

Watch out Cabbagetown! These two homosexuals are going to be taking over this summer: Sunbathing in Wellesley Park; Getting 'caffine highs' at Jet Fuel; Night time strolls past Sarah Polly’s house; Rollerblading to and from the organic grocers on the Danforth; Stumbling home drunk after many a night in the Gay Village!

Good Times!

Friday, February 03, 2006

Liza with a Zed!


This past year, I had the chance to realize a dream of every gay man in North America . . . I got to see LIZA MINNELLI!!! TWICE!!!!!

Cell Phone Boy and I went to see her at the premier of her concert on film (Liza With A 'Z', filmed in NYC, 1972) at the Toronto International Film Festival in September (Pictured). I didn't know until that day that Liza was off the booze. She was so fantastically funny; better than I could have ever thought.

Not two months later, The Boyfriend had given me concert tickets to see Ms. Minnelli for my birthday. Early November we were headed off to Casino Ramma for a really . . . interesting (?) concert. She may have been off the booze ("Trust me, it's Gatorade"), but I think the years of emulating her mother had taken their toll on her voice . . . and co-ordination . . . and balance . . . and depth perception. Still, one of my greatest nights in recent memory. Not to mention that the hottest man in the auditorium was sitting right beside me.

It's a shame, what happened to her mother and her. Hollywood, fame, and all the ego and expectations that go along with it; is it really worth it? They were truly two of the greatest entertainers that ever set foot on this planet. But at what cost?

Sad to think that they did all they could for their fans . . . to be loved by people . . . to be admired . . . to be accepted . . . to be adored. Only to have the great Baby Gumm die, sad and alone, and the talented young Ms. Minnelli be so used.

WE love you Liza. We will always love you. Keep sipping the Gatorade.

Some of my work . . .


Here is a make-over I did a few years back. My models is a friend from Yellowknife named Chelsea. You can see more pictures of her, and other models, on My Professional Website (See side bar . . . coincedentally the link is labelled 'My Professional Website').




My laundry is almost done.


I think my underpants are almost finished their final spin. Once they're hung to dry I can get ready for beddy-bye. I love my underpants. I love laundry actually. . . . .

There are few things that offer us such instant gratification. . . and so effortlessly. You put a load in the wash, do your dishes, transfer clothing to dryer, dust and wash mirrors, fold, iron and done. The whole time wearing your finest pearls.

Remember, this is me writing short, pointless posts. What are your thoughts?

A Post? Anyone? No? Post? Anyone? No?

Wow! I got off to such a good start with this whole blogging thing, and now . . . now it's all shit. I write daily for two weeks, and then I seem to fall off the ends of the planet.

I tried. Stuff has happened that I wanted to write about but . . . couldn't. Well, some of which I couldn't because too many people have this address, and not everything is public knowledge yet. That or I just couldn't figure out if anything was worth writing about. . .

I went to see 'The Dead Body Exhibit' at The Science Center (also known and advertised as 'Body Worlds'), but I couldn't think of an interesting angle to write about it from. Plus, I knew The Boyfriend was gonna write about it and I think he did a much better job than I could have come up with. . .

I lost my iPod and was gonna write about that, but I can't think of how that could be considered anywhere near interesting. It fell out of my coat . . . 'nough said. . .

I've been doing great at the gym. Five weeks in and I've not cheated once!!! Well, I did bust up my knee a little, but I think that has more to do with the weather than the weight. Apparently my thighs are stronger than my knee's. Cousin Julie has been helping me through it. . .

Jasper is gone; I am without dog. A client / friend, who volunteers at The Humane Society told me that there is a Bulldog there ready for adoption. Her name is Bertha (the dog, not my client / friend; her name is Barb). I may foster her and see if I'll keep her (again, I mean the dog, not Barb). . .

I miss Cell Phone Boy. I don't see enough of him lately. I heart him. . .

But really, I'm not sure that any of those topics have enough meat to sustain a whole post. Maybe they do. Or maybe I just need to write shorter posts. That could be my shtick; quick one liners that people can post comments on and have open discussion. Oh, who am I kidding? No one reads this damn thing anyway.

The only reason I have time to write now is that I happen to be at home and was about to do my last load of laundry (HA!!! I said 'load'!), and my previous load (HA! I said it again!) seemed to not have been rinsed enough, so I had to put it through again. Now I wait. Now I blog.

So are we agreed? Short quick posts that mean nothing and are just there to make the people at blogger.com seem like they're doing their job? Let's try it, shall we?